A Natural Barrier

I miss waking up at noon and sitting in the afternoon sun, without a single care about what I looked like or what I was wearing, merely content to be there in the light. I miss being able to take a novel out with me and read until the sun went down, or paint until the mosquitoes came out. I feel that there is a barrier now between me and what is natural for me. It's strange, but I suppose that one day I'll wake up and realise that it's become normal and that what I miss now is long gone, melted into a distant past. But perhaps I'll find that I do like this new lifestyle more than the old, and perhaps I'll find that it is in fact what is natural for me to do. But one day I'll return to not caring what I looked like and focusing instead on how I feel.